2 sheets of seaweed (the kind used for making sushi)

3 large carots

3 onions

3 potatoes

1/3 cup of oatmeal

4 tablespoons chicken broth

2 tablespoons soy sauce

3 table spoons crushed garlic

2 teaspoons cayenne pepper

1 teaspoon pepper

2 cups of peas

Chop the vegetables and make sure they’re all relatively the same size.

Pour olive oil in a large saucepan and saute the onions until golden brown. Add as much water as you can into the saucepan and add the other veggies and seaweed. Boil for 30 minutes stirring every 10 minutes. Add the remaining ingredients and allow to sit for 20 minutes on low heat.

I searched “im high” on YouTube because… well, I’m high… and all I got was a bunch of shitty T-Pain songs.

I made these this morning and almost half of them are gone. Crispy yet chewy, these hit the spot, and they hit it gooooood.

1 cup firmly packed brown sugar

1/4 cup white sugar

3 cups oatmeal

1/2 cup flour

1 cup melted butter

2 eggs

1 tsp vanilla extract

1 tsp baking soda

2 cups of raisins or 1 cup of chocolate chips (optional)

Mix dry ingredients together in a large bowl.

Mix wet ingredients in another bowl and combine with dry ingredients.

Bake at 365 degrees until the cookies are nice and crispy on top.

Allow to cool for 10 minutes before digging in (they dont hold together very well when they’re hot form the oven, but become firm once they’ve cooled down).

Staying the night with a hook-up is a common occurrence; having a pleasant morning however, is not. You smell like shit, your hair is fucked, 50% of your makeup has been smeared off your face, and whatever is left is smudged. You’re also likely to be tired from barely sleeping and hungover from the extra 3 beers you didn’t need. This is your classic morning-after.

There are also other things that happen. Things people would rather keep to themselves.

First of all, you’ve probably been holding farts in all night. The alcohol is your stomach is making you feel gassy. You may even be constipated. Having sex in the morning (when you’re probably still drunk) can be great, but if you’re gassy or constipated, pass on the sex. Guys can FEEL this shit in your anus through the wall of your vagina. Your ass hole and your vagina are relatively close together.

Second, your breath WREAKS. There’s really nothing else to say about that.

Third, you don’t know where the fuck your clothes are. You may see a t-shirt on the floor beside the bed and one of your socks, but you don’t know where your jeans, bra, underwear (or dignity) are. You could just get up and find them, but your probably somewhat self-conscious about walking around butt naked in front of Tim from the bar.

Basically, if you can avoid staying over, do so. Unless you don’t get hungover, bloated, gassy, or self-conscious.